Done

I'm so tired. I've never felt so emotionally and physically drained. I'm just so tired. If you could just lay here with me & help me forget the world.

Cold as ice & strong as the storm

Infont of my macbook, dressed in my grey tanktop and denim shorts with my hair up in a bun, lashes coated with just mascara, typing this entry over Java chip at starbucks. I think i look wierd today because I have been sensing pairs of eyes looking at me in a distance from where I am sitting. Perhaps because I am too casual for a mall which is stupid (in my self-justification part) because don't they at least think about the possible fact that i live across the street or that I am born a plain jane.

Ok maybe I am just being paranoid.

It is saturday and I am making use of this time to relax my nous and reading whilst surrounded between all these existence,  hustle and bustle around me. I have no idea why but i love it. I feel like I'm immense in my own zone. I could choose to stress over stock markets but its okay,  I'm good.

Happy people everywhere.

I wonder how thier day starts. They probably planned to shop here a week ago and finally manage to savour their long await weekends or maybe they decided that it would be relishing to look happy and glam up just to run some errands.  I have a couple on my left side who prolly banged each other last night because they look so euphoric and chirpy while sharing their cheesecake. Good for you.

Infront of me are two beautiful girls highly likely preparing for A levels as i saw their GP notes scattered all over the table- Not that I am such a quidnunc to be looking at their shit but I really hate messy things. It instantaneously catches my attention.

You know the scene from pursuit of happ(y)ness where Will Smith observe how others are all smiling jubilantly when he's having such a hard time trying to make ends meet.. I think I'm in that moment. Not that I'm trying to make ends meet but....

My happiness however is lock up in a bunk, away from me.

My life is an intricate work of art

It's really hard to grasp on the fact that I have anxiety. Sometimes it gets so vexing that I could feel the strong palpitations every 20 minutes. Biting my tounge whenever I feel it acting up.

Just wrap me around artificial happiness.